Ever Feel Invisible?

alice surf

Dear Creators of WONDER and MAGIC-

Last week my sister Maria  (click link to listen to her perform “My sister Sarah the Life coach!) who is a WORLD famous comedian was in town with her husband Scott and we had a wonderful visit!

(all of us with Dad at the Knife River!)

I had brunch with Maria + Scott and a lovely mutual friend.  As we were eating, our old high school English teacher strolled to our table and went straight to Maria to speak only with her.  He wasn’t interested in speaking with either myself or our friend (who was also a former student of his).

Though it may sound pitiful and ridiculous, a part of me (click link for more about IFS Parts Work) immediately felt invisible and another part of me knew it was silly to feel that way.  After all- Maria truly is a real life celebrity with several TV shows and incredible talent! Of course he would want to speak only with her.

But I noticed how parts of me closed myself off to the teacher immediately, even though he was one of my favorites.

After I got home, I took some time to sit and noodle my reaction. I could feel a part of myself slipping into a quicksand quagmire of self pity.  In addition to this part who felt invisible, I had another part of myself who was busy shaming me for feeling that way.  She was like “Get over yourself!!  You’re FINE- just let it go already..”.  But another part of me couldn’t.

So I decided to take a journey to the lower world to visit my helping spirits with help from the drum.  I explained what happened to my Mother Bear.  She nodded and then scooped me up in her arms and I became like a tiny Sarah.  She carted me to a ridge where we could see a beautiful view.  She explained to me that being “SEEN” is one of the most lovely experiences here on earth and to treasure it when it happens.  AND then she explained, there is more.

She showed me a vision of millions of beautiful snowflakes falling to earth.  How many of them ever get “SEEN”? she asked?  I imagined not too many.  I mean, once in a while I will catch one in my mittened hand and oggle it in awe but mostly – they just fall…completely unnoticed.

Mother bear said that in that moment when we see a snowflake and admire it- it’s an ectastic experience for that snowflake….just like its a joy and pleasure for us to be SEEN by a friend or a stranger.

But, Mother Bear said, the other 10,000,000,000,000 snowflakes who are not SEEN get to enjoy the ECSTASY of simply BEING.

So, she advised me to enjoy being SEEN and ALSO to be sure to enjoy BEING.

I finally relaxed and saw her wisdom. I didn’t need to suffer because I wasn’t SEEN—-I had the choice to simply enjoy BEING too.

I don’t know if this story will translate for you, but boy it saved my bacon that Sunday afternoon. Because instead of being stuck in a quagmire, I reentered a state of BEING and it was JOY and I didn’t need to be SEEN.

Its easiest for me to step into my BEING-NESS whenI am creating–making art, arranging flowers, dreaming up a new class, singing, walking, dancing…you get the picture.

How about you? What makes you feel ALIVE…and helps you really step into the FREQUENCY OF BEING?

There is ecstasy there!

I share this story because also because I have found connecting to GOD/The Divine/The Universe via the helping spirits (i. e. spirit animals or spirit teachers in human form) to be so powerful and helpful. Especially for these wounded parts of me who want to be seen and appreciated.

They inspire me, guide me and empower me (not to mention protect me from the not so helpful impulses of my ego).

If you’d like to develop such a relationship for yourself, I suggest starting with The Book of Beasties or watch and experience my Beginners Guide to Shamanic Journeying.

Cultivating a more intimate relationship with spirit could change your life, it changed mine.

As always, I’m here if you could use a spiritual healing or a session of coaching or shamanic mentoring.  We all need sacred space to be held for us from time to time..so we can find our way.  You can always find and schedule sessions here.  

with much love,


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