Carrying the Love Forward
My mom was forever buying my sister @mariabamfordcomedy and I “good coats” so that in case they died (on vacation), we would be prepared for their funeral. As of March 10, both of my parents are both gone from this world now. In honor of my momma, I wore one of the “good coats” to my dad’s celebration of life yesterday. This painting was done in Dad’s honor. I’m feeling so grateful for the love I have received.
I’m feeling inspired to carry it forward in every single thing I do!
Note: This original painting of mine (honoring my dad’s Core Beastie- The Tapir) will be in an exhibit in April at Zeitgeist Arts in Duluth in April- Reception will be April 21 or 22? Would love to see you there!
The painting has already SOLD to a collector in Canada who is planting seeds of peace for men and boys.
Here is my short list of FEEL GOOD ideas I hope will inspire you!
1. So much Can Change in 18 Days. Just 18 days ago my beloved 81 year old dad, Joel Bamford, called to say his COVID symptoms were worse and he had fallen in the kitchen trying to get ice for a glass of water. He died peacefully just over a week later, and this morning I feel as if I have lived a lifetime in those 18 days. What stands out as I swept his office clean yesterday, boxing up things for Goodwill and recycling so many pieces of paperwork is this: In the end, all of my possessions will be swept away…GONE (save the few things my kids might want?) …and all that will remain is the sense of love I fostered and the creative endeavors I left behind.
Gratefully, Dad left a book of his humorous + soulful poems behind which I will be savoring. If you knew you’d be dying this week, what would be most important to share with those around you (and those far away)?.
2. Slide Behind The Wheel. Even If You Don’t Know What You’re Doing. Here’s what I shared at my Dad’s Celebration of Life (you can watch me deliver the 4 minutes here: here at YOUTUBE )
“The primary feeling arising in me today is gratitude because we were the lifelong recipients of a landslide of my dad’s love and care.
I’ve been in touch this past week with his dear friend Mary Lewis who he grew up with him in Bronxsville, New York. They travelled on to Stanford University together and have remained friends for over 70 years .
She said that dad was born “bien dan sa peau”, which in French means comfortable in his own skin. I treasured his authenticity.
He also loved to see others grow in their confidence to do new things- to diagnose skin disease or to sail a boat.
He always encouraged complete novices to simply jump in and try whatever it was. One day when I was ten years old, dad picked me up on a Saturday afternoon from my church pal, Sarah Spencer’s house on Garden Street. Dad was looking dapper in his black tuxedo on a late summer afternoon.
He offered me the thrilling opportunity to drive the car home. I had no knowledge of cars whatsoever but I was, of course, excited to try.
As you might imagine, we didn’t make it far. I turned a little too hard at the very first corner and our station wagon slowly rammed the curb and we ended up on the sidewalk.
Dad taught me that it’s ALWSYS a good idea to JUMP IN and just BEGIN …OF COURSE there will be failure- but you can always change a tire – even when you’re in black tie.
Joy comes from discovering and eventually mastering new skills! In my grief yesterday I was asking god- “how can I honor him now? What would that look like?”
The answer came back swiftly, “Sarah, be yourself.”.
The One Thing You Could SAY to Improve Your Partnership.
They studied 40,000 couples’ language…and it turns out that those who say THANK YOU with regularity have the best relationships. (excerpt from article below)
- With every little thing you do for each other (making a cup of coffee every morning, washing the dishes when it’s not one’s turn, or bringing home one’s favorite snack).
- When you receive a genuine compliment (say “thank you” instead of deflecting the praise by saying something like “oh, it’s nothing”).
- When one of you shows patience (e.g., when you run late, or when your partner is having a tantrum).
- When one of you actively listens and gives the other one their undivided attention (say “thank you for listening”).
- When you support each other, especially in times of need (say “thank you for being there with me when I was going through “X thing”).
Read the whole article here. This idea inspired me mucho and in the BLUR of the last few days of exhausting activity, I have said thank you so much more often to Mark and it seems to be shifting things….and we haven’t gone into the ditch (where a stressful week like this last one might have normally pushed us).
- Quote I am adoring:
One must believe in one’s talent to take the long hard push and pull ahead, but a talent is like a plant… It may simply wither if it is not given enough food, sun, tender care. And to give it those things means working at it every day.
– May Sarton on being a creative!
If I could say anything to each of you as you embark on your daily creations, work in this world and interactions with others it would be this:
KNOW THAT YOU ARE AMAZING!!! When we keep reminding our brain to think good thoughts- it helps everything.
And do a little bit of your “art” every day that you can. 15 minutes daily adds up!
5. Could Preparing a Snack Plate Help your partnership?
“Whoever gets back from work first prepares a snack plate. This helps us readjust to being home, prevents hunger-induced arguments, and stops us scrounging for unhealthy nibbles before our evening meal.”So many great tips on partnership here from readers of The Guardian.
I am headed to Japan soon and cannot wait to share lots of beauty and insight from that amazing island that I have been in love with since I’ve been young! Follow me here at Instagram to see them all.
You can book vibe-raising divinations, life- coaching, and shamanic healing/mentoring later in April and into May June HERE.
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